Angkor Temples, Outside Siem Reap
Hookers
Whores aren't really my bag. At first, I thought they were just nice girls who liked a good game of pool. Naive? Probably.
Something became a bit fishy when I realised that these girls were far too good at pool (better than Orlando even, although
my clumsy 10 stone dog is better than Orlando so that isn't really an informative comparison but anywayz). There is always
one girl that gets attached in the vain hope of some cash dollar (I'd like to think it will be atleast 40 years before I
start paying for sex! haha). I won't tell you about the Pnomn Penh lady of the night, however, the Sinhoukville girl was
funny yet tragic.
It was a real story of romance: we met at the beach bar, drunk a bucket of booze, had a little dance then went skinny dipping
(with about 30 other people btw). The evening turned somewhat sour when she started crying, claiming that her life was so
miserable (being a whore and all). That led me to a minor depression. I reckon I could get that commissioned for a TV movie
or something. I need to work on the ending. I even have an idea for the main lady... can anyone guess? yyyyyyam gnon. While I
think of it, add 'skinny dipping' to my list of hated words- sounds like an aussie throwback.
Naparoony: Orlando + Booze = Sleep
Oh, while I'm writing about prostitutes, let me explain Orlando's
interaction with them. The first time was in a Pnomn Penh club called "The Heart of Darkness". Orlando was pissed on
Margarita's or whatever other girly drink had taken his fancy that night (he is allergic to beer as some of you may know). I
wish I had a picture cos it was the funniest site ever. He had this *OLD* run down Cambodian shlag midget grinding up and
down his leg like it was a poll, and Orlando was so drunk that he was just standing there like an inanimate object. In the
end, I helped Orlando shake her off like she was Will Kirk(Jones)'s horny poodle. On the skinny dipping night, Orlando missed
the action after passing out on the beach (whilst probably drinking a Sex on the Beach).
Abandoned Hotel at Bokor Hill Station
Octopussy
It's funny: one minute I'm watching James Bond's Octopussy in the beach town of Sinhoukville (cos it was all filmed in
Rajasthan, India), and the next day I'm eating Octopus from some dodgy floating restaurant in the southern town of Kampot.
What wasn't funny is that I was up all night in a mank bathroom swimming in an array of tentacles and bile (add 'bile' to my
top ten list of hated words). Orlando ofcourse slept through this whole ordeal. The next morning, the local witch doctor
turns up, and in my weakened state I am unable to resist him scratching tiger balm into various spots (later wounds) on my
collar bone and back with a metal blade. Did this make me feel any better? Why yeees! Put that in your pipe and smoke it
modern medicine. It may have simply been a distractive technique however, where the pain of the grazes made me forget about
the pain in my stomach, but what the hell's wrong with that?
The Killing Fields, Choeung Ek
Other shit
Not wanting to dampen the mood too much, I won't talk too much about the attrocities that occurred in Cambodia all so
recently (late 70's right up until about '96). Under Pol Pot, an estimated 3 million were killed over just a few years (a
third of the population). The stories from the elder English speaking Cambodians are really heart breaking and the country is
littered with hints of its violent past. The Killing Fields of Choeung Ek and the S-21 prison in Pnomn Penh are very
disturbing and something I will not forget.
In the north of the country, Siem Reap was a good laugh and we visited the temples of
Bokor National Park just before Orlando
nearly paralysed himself
Angkor which I would not give justice to
if I tried to describe them in words. On the animal front, we have been chased by a pack of dogs, I nearly got bitten by a
fat labrador, and an angry pig had a go at me when I tried to say hello to one of its piglets. We also visited the seaside
town of Kep and the Bokor hill station where there is a huge abandoned hotel and a waterfall. At the waterfall, Orlando
managed to slip on a rock and currently has huge scratches down his back and arms (what a plonker- I like that word). We are
also finding it hard to sit down after the longest, bumpiest pick-up truck ride ever! It feels like I've been raped by an
elephant. I'll leave you on that beautiful piece of imagery... Vietnam here we come. Peace.
Posted by Will Ryan under the category
Travel.
1 Comment
